Are Video Games Causing Marital Trouble?


I listened to a local news story about how video games are causing marital issues. They reported that 15% of women say their husbands’ obsession with gaming is cause for their divorce. It was only 5% a year ago in the same survey. I think part of this is due to them not working out the real issues in their marriage, or maybe it’s just that some guys are really addicted to games and don’t care about anything else. If you are playing games for 8+ hours every day, and your aren’t getting paid to do it, I think that’s a little much for a married guy. Unless your wife if out of town. Then get in all the gaming you can!

I’m married myself and I don’t game as much anymore. More so because I’m busy with other things; having less money to spend on games is a issue as well, but I also make time to spend with my wife. When I do play games, it’s usually when my wife is working on her own project or is out of the house. Sometimes she works on her projects on the couch and I sit by her and play my games. We do play together, but that’s a rare thing. The game we’ve been playing together lately is Pac-Man Championship Edition DX. She also plays her own games on the computer from time to time, like the classic Burger Time or Reversi.

Honestly, I think wives are to eager to attack their husbands for playing video games because they already have a bad rap, so it’s an easy target. They need to be understanding that this is something men enjoy, and to let them have their gaming time. Men don’t complain about when their wife does scrap booking, watching soaps, shopping (unless they get to go with, noooooo), Facebook, etc.

But that doesn’t mean husbands can spend all their time gaming and leave no time for their wife either. There needs to be a balance, it’s up to you to find that balance. Better yet, try to get her to play games with you!

How do you get your gaming time in? Does your wife bother you about your gaming or is she more understanding? What are your thoughts on this matter?


Written by: T0SH - Cofounder of PS3Blog.net


  1. #1 by Luke on June 22nd, 2011 [ 27382 Points ]

    I defiantly think that a lot of guys get to caught up in it and cause an issue. Going from 5% to 15% is a big problem.

  2. #2 by Captain_CHEETO on June 22nd, 2011

    I am married for almost 4 years now. I have 2 daughters (had the youngest on May 27th this year). I do have troubles managing my life to get some playtime every now and then, but I think after 4 years of marriage my wife started to realize that playing video games is not a hobby, or an addiction, or even an obsession for me, its more of a passion. I know this sound ridiculous, but I try to share this moments with her whenever I could, by talking about how hard a boss fight was, or how disappointed I was after playing a lousy campaign, we even talk about how realistic and beautiful some games look and how refreshing and innovative some other games are. My advice is to share this passion with your significant other. Make them feel that this is not your (special time) and sometimes take time to explain how the game works. Yes, by doing so you show that you want her to share this experience with you. I try to pick up a game every now and then specifically for her. despite the fact that I didn’t like LBP at first, but I learned to adapt and enjoy it as well.
    I remember when my wife was pregnant with our second baby, she used to spent time watching me play Battlefield Bad company 2, she actually used to ask me to go online so she can watch me drive a tank.
    I remember the day i got home and she was playing Plants vs Zombies on LIVE. That day I knew that everything will be alright.

  3. #3 by Oly on June 22nd, 2011 [ 132360 Points ]

    Nice article.. Now days, I usually try to get in my game time after the family goes to sleep. 10-11pm till about 1am usually…
    I know that when I was “addicted” to Star Wars Galaxies, and was working on unlocking my Jedi, my wife used to complain a lot.. and it def did cause some stress at times. You just have to prioritize the family first.
    I also play with the kids when time permits, especially my son, and we have a great time.

  4. #4 by jwhyrock on June 22nd, 2011 [ 13 Points ]

    I just pay prostitutes to lick my balls while I play video games. While my wife is out of the house of course. I am subjected to american idol during the year so it’s fair.

  5. #5 by Jay on June 22nd, 2011 [ 83111 Points ]

    Men don’t complain about when their wife does scrap booking, watching soaps, shopping (unless they get to go with, noooooo), Facebook, etc.

    lolololol

  6. #6 by Jason on June 22nd, 2011 [ 26206 Points ]

    I was playing monster hunter tri online and this guys wife said she would blow him if he got off and he wouldn’t lol Stupid!

    I never played games the 13yrs i was with my sons mother. I dont know how you guys do it. Theres so much wasted time when you have someone to share it with. Just my opinion though.

  7. #7 by Pedro on June 22nd, 2011 [ 39949 Points ]

    Jason: 00Rate this
    I was playing monster hunter tri online and this guys wife said she would blow him if he got off and he wouldn’t lol Stupid!

    LOL, nothing and I mean NOTHING justify not getting a bj. just saying…

    I’m not married, but I do share the same kind of problem with my girlfriend. She’s not really into video games and I rarely play when I’m with her.

    Mostly when I do play, it’s because she’s playing farmville (¬¬) at facebook.

    Earlier in our relationship we had a lot of problems because I didn’t pay attention to her complaints and it was almost the end for us. Now I don’t even dare, as I consider our relationship to be more important.

  8. #8 by EdEN on June 22nd, 2011 [ 142686 Points ]

    @Luke: Hello! Nice job on your new site!

    Know when it can become a problem? When the spouse either doesn’t understand how fun videogames can be or tries to control their significant other. The wife KNEW what she was getting into and after 4 years of marriage and a 3 month old daughter I’ve never had a gaming related issue.

  9. #9 by jwhyrock on June 22nd, 2011 [ 13 Points ]

    Exactly. Compromise is essential. I find with work I’m burnt out all the time which plays a much larger role in my “non” gaming than my wife being overly demanding. My wife doesn’t “get” gaming but enjoys watching me play LBP, Flower and De Blob 2. Not so much on Fallout hehe.

  10. #10 by jwhyrock on June 22nd, 2011 [ 13 Points ]

    the above post is the heavily edited version minus the variety of sexual content I included = boring. censorship sucks.

  11. #11 by Captain_CHEETO on June 23rd, 2011

    Jason: Theres so much wasted time when you have someone to share it with. Just my opinion though.  

    I think that is a part of the problem. Women like to share stuff, it doesn’t matter how insignificant they are. We on the other side don’t really pay attention to details (at least in my case). I rather share this time with her than listen to her complain about why I am spending so much time (jumping around dressed like a lunatic) when I was trying to get the (Crack the E Nigma) achievement!

  12. #12 by myk26 on June 23rd, 2011 [ 1325 Points ]

    Been with her for 15 years….married for 10 of those. Oh, and she HATES games! Although after 10 years, I was able to find 1 game…but unfortunately thats Dance Central.

    My gaming situation sounds spot on to Oly’s! Of course every once in a blue moon I’ll get a game I’ve been diein for and start playing before 10-11pm. But usually I’m a midnight gamer, w/ some fun times thrown in with the son here and there (but he’s still on that Lego kick). Thanks to the Welcome Back program, we’ve been having some great times on LBP.

  13. #13 by FrenchK on June 23rd, 2011 [ 325 Points ]

    I also have a fiancé and two kids, so my gaming time is restricted a lot. My rule of thumb is to not play when the kids are up or around, so usually not before 7:30-8h. Then usually take time to do the chores we have to do around the house, or watch some Tv with the Wife. and maybe at around 9-10ish i game a little, with the wife if she feels like playing (LBP, Mortal kombat, Lego HP, Lego Pirates) otherwise i’ll just play whatever and she’ll watch or just sit beside on the couch and read a book.

    We have been together for 5 years, and she has known from the start that i was an addicted gamer. I’m passionnate gaming, but i’d also say i’m addicted. For me anyhow it’s a way of escaping everyday life, and embarking on a journey. The trick is balance, over the years, i’ve taking my gaming down a lot, but i can hardly imagine to not game at all.

    Personally, while gaming, i forget everything else, may it be problems, they hard day’s work or a bad case of asthma.

  14. #14 by goulfreak on June 23rd, 2011 [ 94 Points ]

    no i do not think because it can be the guys fault for not paying enough attention to the women so its not the video games cause he infact can stop playing anytime he wants and its also the womens fault for not trying to statisfy the guy enough

  15. #15 by Jay on June 23rd, 2011 [ 83111 Points ]

    goulfreak: its also the womens fault for not trying to statisfy the guy enough

    ahahahahaha, ftw

  16. #16 by GeneticMania on June 23rd, 2011 [ 1450 Points ]

    Knew this guy awhile back named Eric, (GeneticDementia) who had the perfect setup. Go to work, get home around 6, spend a few hours with family then go to “The Man Room” around 8 or 9. Guys, “The Man Room” will save your marriage if gaming is a problem. (Results may vary) He took a day off every other week or so to spend more time with the family of course. I miss Eric, have no way to find or contact him.

    I don’t have any problems cause I’m not in a relationship, and it wouldn’t workout anyways do to the fact that I stay in my room all day. The only thing I enjoy more than hanging out in my room is playing with children. Kids are hilarious and full of surprises, much more entertaining than a game. Which is why I wish I had a little sister, so I can play tea party and not look weird while doing it.

  17. #17 by The_Nmac on June 24th, 2011 [ 47658 Points ]

    I try to get 2 types of games.

    One’s that I play after my wife goes to bed that she does not enjoy: Killzone, Call of Duty(mostly shooters)

    One’s that she likes to watch and I enjoy to play. Uncharted, Batman:AA, LA Noire, LBP.

    This seems to keep things good. Also me being a gamer was not secret right from the start. When we started dating she used to watch me play Windwaker on the gamecube.

  18. #18 by Ace on June 24th, 2011 [ 23465 Points ]

    This reminds me of the good ‘ol Kevin Butler commercial:

  19. #19 by GeneticMania on June 24th, 2011 [ 1450 Points ]

    Ace:

    This reminds me of the good ‘ol Kevin Butler commercial:
      

    ^

    Thank you Ace, thank you.


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